Friday, February 1, 2013

By George I Think I've Got It!!

I'M A REAL CHRISTIAN!!

I did something rather brilliant last year (even if I do say so myself). I actually put an entry in my calendar signifying that I had -
"Finally gotten to the place where I wanted to  give my whole life to God and serve Him above all else."

I had completely forgotten I had done this, but today when I checked my phone, there is was. A reminder in my calendar that it was one year today since I decided to become a serious Christian!

As many of you know I have called myself a Christian for many years now. However, my walk with God didn't begin in earnest until I became injured in 2011. I had a cross around my neck, went to church sporadically, and yet couldn't figure out why I was still struggling in life and still desperately trying to figure out why I had a superficial relationship with Jesus. I wanted to KNOW Him! I knew people whose walk with God was so amazing, and I desperately wanted to have what they had! Yet, it continued to elude me.


Then, the fortuitous twist of my ankle. What started out as a "Oh, it's nothing - just a sprain" kind of sprain, turned in to a nightmare that, quite literally, brought me to my knees! The pain was so excruciating that I didn't know what else to do but pray. The doctors didn't know what to do with me. I couldn't find anyone to "fix" me and I was terrified of the pain. I had no idea what the heck was going on, but God knew.

Then, again, BAM! I was struck with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and my already small world became microscopic. I had no energy to do anything! I had to stop working, even conversations became too exhausting for me. I think some of you will be able to relate to this next statement...
Praying and reading my bible was always my last resort!



What the heck is up with that?!? Why is it that we, OK - me, always seem to go to God as a last resort?And I was supposed to be a "serious" Christian! What I didn't understand at the time was that God was using this time of illness to teach me. Unfortunately, I was beginning to feel like the Israelites,  wandering around my desert for 40 years on what should have been a seven day trip! But God was patient and I was learning. What became apparent, just in this last year (what can I tell you), was that when I spent a good 1-3 hours doing my own bible study (it's not like I had anything else to do), my mood and outlook on life was dramatically better. Yet, I was STILL struggling with the concept of letting go completely and trusting God that He was going to work out this painful mess for my good. And God waited.

Then, it happened. About six months ago, I experienced something so amazing... so faith-altering, that I still think back on it with wonder.

I was out walking one afternoon and I began having a conversation with God. This one was different somehow. It was as though God went from being up there somewhere in the heavens, to RIGHT THERE! Right by my side. That was an incredible shift!

Then, again, I had a very bad relapse. I felt like I was losing my mind and being consumed by it all. My pain and fatigue were off the charts and I was getting to the place where I didn't think I could cope. Then, literally, I felt God pluck me out of what I can only describe as a dark pit of anguish. Right at that moment, I experienced the truth that God will never tempt me beyond what I can bare. All at once, it went from my head to my heart.

Fast forward to today. My pain was very bad today, to the point where it was catching my breath. But I didn't get stressed out, I didn't get scared, without even trying my thoughts were of how blessed I was and how God really has been looking after us. Then almost immediately my thoughts became fearful like they used to. But, and here is the amazing part -
I knew they were a lie!

I have experienced so many wondrous things along my walk with God these past five years. I wish I could say that I never have any fearful days anymore. Now that would be a lie. Our walk with God is a process. I look back on how much I have changed, even just this past month, and I am so grateful! Yes, I still have some days where I feel overwhelmed by my pain and fatigue. On those days, I do find it difficult to feel peace and gratitude for my life. Thankfully, the more time I spend in prayer and, especially, studying God's Word, the better I am able to weather those storms.

Being a Christian doesn't mean never having problems again. It does mean that God will help you through them, when you earnestly seek Him.

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Dear Jesus, thank You for always being there, waiting for me to reach out to You, ready to open the door and come in to my life. While I don't always understand why things happen, today is the day I will choose to trust You. I pray for the strength to help me through these tough days, and for Your peace which You have given me. Amen


If you would like to accept Christ in to your life or have questions, please contact your local church, or you can also call Joyce Meyer Ministries. They always have staff on hand to answer questions or offer prayers.